Sunday, December 5, 2010


That's really all I have to say as I prepare to study for finals.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Long time no see

Yep. I'm posting.

Well, I wasn't going to but something is bothering me. Everyone here on campus (well most of my friends) comments that they don't want to mentor a freshman that is religious. And then say they don't like religious people. I guess I have been misbehaving rather badly in the Christian department. I haven't been to church here in college town in a while. I don't like the churches I've been too as they weren't lively enough. I want a church where people aren't afraid to praise God when they feel like it. I want people to show emotion when they sing. So I stopped. I'm not very active with the Christian organizations on campus either. I guess I need to get back in the game. It's worse off than I thought. Oh well, what is past is past. No way to change it. Guess I gotta work on the future now. Yep, lots to do in school and in self.


Tuesday, July 14, 2009

bras confuse me

Today, I went bra shopping. I hate it especially since they are expensive but I need new ones. From a previous shopping excursion I found that I seem to be in between sizes, so I sought the Playtex Thank Goodness It Fits half sizes. Couldn't find them today or previously. So I opted to two sizes. I grabbed both A and B of the cheapest ones and took them to the dressing room.

Both fit. I don't get it. I think something is wrong with that brand. Why can't there just be a standard cup size between brands? The band size stays the same, why can't the cup? Sigh...I'll have to try and look somewhere else for the half sizes or random bras that fit as well as possible. Hopefully, they will be cheap.


Monday, June 29, 2009

Body Image

You know a lot of women have body image issues and I account myself as one of them. Some people would think me crazy because I'm a bean pole but I do.

I've been thinking about this lately due to a blog post by Mm. I was a simple statement but a hurtful one. She mentions much as a lot of people do that a friend of hers looks like a "real" woman. I, like a lot of thin women, hate these comments. Just because I happen to fit the stereotype of beautiful more than you does not make me an less "real" than you are. I'm tired of hearing people say "I'll give you some of mine." and "I wish I had your problem" when I mention not being able to do something do to my small size. I'm tired of being told I'm 12 (although I have been getting 15 recently. Marked improvement I'll say).

But after sitting and thinking as well as reading other blogs, I came to realize that all the ads in the media are to blame. For both sides of hate talk. Admittedly overweight women have it a lot worse but I don't think it's fair to dismiss my complaints just because so stupid fashion designer decided that anorexic was a good look. It's not my total fault I'm thin. I also shouldn't blame all the overweight women picking up the slogan "real women have curves." I applaud the effort to help normal and overweight women feel better which is a good thing but that is hurtful to me. I often feel that I couldn't possibly be attractive enough since I can fit into a size 2-4 and wear an A-cup. But now is the time to end all this. At least for me.

Recently, something just clicked in my head or changed in me...I'm feeling more of the second. I guess it was an epiphany of sorts. I just realized that the media doesn't decide what is beautiful. Nor do those who tell me "Wow, you're SO skinny." as though they feel sorry for me. I personally want to weigh more but now it's for health reasons. Who decides that I am beautiful as God made me is me. No one else. I personally would like to see an end to all this "real" women business. All women are real. Whether we happen to fall in the small percentage of underweight, the growing percentage (around 57% I think) of those classified as overweight, or some where in between, I think we should ignore the media and just support each other realizing that we all have beauty.

I'd also like to say, sometimes I can not understand why some bigger women even want to lose weight. I can think of some people who look gorgeous fitting the label obese. And I personally think that if there are no health problems and they are happy they should be left alone. And vice versa, although, thin people don't face nearly as much ridicule as those on the other end of the spectrum.

Ah, what it must be to not be told "you need to eat more" or "you need to eat less" and just be average. What would the world be like if we heard "you look good!" instead?


Thursday, March 12, 2009


OK to start, I signed that in my head. ASL penetrates into all aspects of my life. I randomly sign things while I'm thinking or talking to others. especially fingerspelling. I do it without realizing I'm doing it sometimes. I don't know I'm doing it until someone asks me what I was spelling. I wonder sometimes how often I fingerspell when I'm alone without knowing it. I should video tape myself and find out. not going to bother, waste of film.

anyways, back to topic of the post even though I never started it in the first place. I am tired. I have been tired for a while.(mostly at the end of a day) It make me think I could be anemic. But then I think back to my sleeping habits and tell myself I'll go to bed early and see if I really am then never make it bed to early to test the theory. So, I'll try to get into bed tonight at a descent hour but then it's Friday so I don't know if that's going to happen.

You know, I have an energy drink. But the interesting thing is I have no clue what it will do to me. Could make me sleepy could give me energy. Caffiene has an odd effect on me you see, opposite(2 servings of strong coffee or so) in fact. But the drink also has crap loads of sugar, which makes me hyper. What will happen? I really should experiment on myself. So now is not the time. I want to do it from a baseline of not hyper, not tired. just normal. Which again requires me to get sleep. sigh. sleep and college student don't agree in most situations. partly our fault, partly life. This all could be just a long day as my MWTh's are.


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Am I a Geek?

You know I talk about the oddness of my friends and me often. But I just realized that we really and truly DON'T have normal conversations.


No. 1
Yesterday, Moon had an odd headache that was partly sinusitis, partly migraine. She inquired as to which med she should take: sinus med or Excedrin. So she began to describe what hurt. She started with the pressure in her face and pain in the eye then went into the pain in her upper occipital lobe and frontal lobe, parietal lobe, and along the sensory-motor cortex (she now gives me more info than she did last night). At first I just accepted the info and was about to give my suggestion when it hit me: most people don't discuss head pain in terms of lobes. Most say the side of my head hurts or the back of my head hurts. This is how communication normally takes place. But since the two of us like psychology our communication was a bit different. Can you tell me where her head was hurting? I doubt most could.

No. 2
Today I had a conversation with Perv on Facebook. We were talking and being, well his name, he asked me if he could be my secant* line. I promptly said no, and I would not spoon with him. He was first confused then it dawned on him that I understood him perfectly. I guess he thought he could get away with a perv suggestion. Too bad for him that I really like calculus. We continued talking and then he once again asked a perv question: If I were your endoplasmic reticulum* how would you want me? Now this is a question he knew I would get considering we are both bio majors.

Can you see how ridiculously geeky my friends and I are? But it is rather enjoyable when you can randomly go "I'm a scolex!" and people laugh and get you.

beaming up,

*secant line is a line that crosses a circle at two points. my reference to spooning was more preventative of him not trying to request being a tanget line

*endoplasmic reticulum (ER) is a part of cells which can be smooth or rough

Monday, March 9, 2009

My finger...

hurts. Don't really know why I started it this way but I did. Guess because I wanted to. Who knows?

Anywho, I'm thinking of buying a college ring online and am toying with the idea of asking to join the ring ceremony. But then I don't know if I want to go through all the trouble of the tradition. Asking faculty to be my sponsor. Talking with my parents about something. Finding stuff to wear. But I think it would be a nice memory. I guess I should talk with our class pres to find out if I can join then decide if I want to.

I also need to pick a gift for my mum. And decide which weekend I want to visit her. I also need to pick a girt for my big's graduation and her b-day too. Sigh, were on earth does money come from and why can't I locate this source?

Ring, possible summer course, 3 gifts, littles...I wish money grew underneath my bed where I could pick it out at will. Would be nice. Maybe only $300 a month. I don't care any little bit would help. I'd gladly accept a dollar. Be very surprised but happy.

Oh big = my mentor, little = my mentor-ee (what is the word for the reciprocal?)


i feel rather out of it right now...