Today, I have managed to get internet at a friend's house as we work on our research project for this summer. We are writing our grant proposal and hoping to get funded. It envolved making a computer program that will show chemical reactions. I won't go into details but I really would like to. I am a sincere science dork/nerd/geek (whichever). But so is my research partner so we're good.
While here at MK's house (my friend) I got to see her kitties and I'm excited because the female one (Kitty) is pregnant. She is adorable and tiny with a bulging belly. She's only 9 months old and almost ready to give birth. The other kitty (a male - KK) is jealous of the attention she's getting. He also got mad at me earlier when I didn't let him in the bathroom while I peed. Apparently, in the wild, the Beta-cat( in this case KK) goes with the alpha-cat (me) and guards him while he's doing his business. Had I known I would have let him do his guarding but I didn't so he just sat outside the bathroom and waited for me. Angrily. You could see it in his face. Oh well, nothing to be done about it. He's now happily tucked away in a new box that MK set up for Kitty to give birth in. So much for that idea.
Now that I have written a suffiecent amout regarding my trip, i will go to happily play WoW and level my character.
Self
I've been waiting to level for some time. I'm happy this trip inables me to multitask!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Nipples and Christmas Break
Apparently, to Moon my exclamation of "New Post!" was really "Nipples!" Wow, she just waved her bra in my face in response to me blowing a raspberry at her. Odd. But then again she's Moon.
I have now finished all of my exams! I had 4, one each day and an essay due today. I'm happy I studies (not as well as I should have) but I think I did okay. At least I got a 96 on my formal lab report! And I just found out the most wonderful news every about Organic chem. Dr. S is going to count the lowest test grade as half as much as the others! Woo! that will help everyone's grade.
Organic bleh! you'd think a biologist would like organic anything, but alas, it is not so. To demonstrate this point several bio majors are dropping their BS degrees to BA degrees so they don't have to take the second half of the course. Lucky them. I can't do that. I'm pre-med, both required. Sigh...
Sadly, my toe began hurting again today. I don't think I mentioned it any previous post but I suffered a toe injury during a play here on campus. It swelled and hurt for about 2 or 3 weeks and then stopped. But now, a month later, it's starting again. Maybe I should go to the doctor if it continues. Although nothing should be wrong. It wasn't broken, just swollen. Sigh...why does like have to include hurting toes? At least it's not something more serious.
yay! home in a few hours!
Self
I'm very glad I get to see Mm's new kitty soon. ^_^
I have now finished all of my exams! I had 4, one each day and an essay due today. I'm happy I studies (not as well as I should have) but I think I did okay. At least I got a 96 on my formal lab report! And I just found out the most wonderful news every about Organic chem. Dr. S is going to count the lowest test grade as half as much as the others! Woo! that will help everyone's grade.
Organic bleh! you'd think a biologist would like organic anything, but alas, it is not so. To demonstrate this point several bio majors are dropping their BS degrees to BA degrees so they don't have to take the second half of the course. Lucky them. I can't do that. I'm pre-med, both required. Sigh...
Sadly, my toe began hurting again today. I don't think I mentioned it any previous post but I suffered a toe injury during a play here on campus. It swelled and hurt for about 2 or 3 weeks and then stopped. But now, a month later, it's starting again. Maybe I should go to the doctor if it continues. Although nothing should be wrong. It wasn't broken, just swollen. Sigh...why does like have to include hurting toes? At least it's not something more serious.
yay! home in a few hours!
Self
I'm very glad I get to see Mm's new kitty soon. ^_^
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Yay! New pointer!
I am terribly excited about something that has always bothered me: the mouse pointer. It made no sense to me at first why that stupid arrow was always pointing to the left. I just couldn't figure it out. Why was it going the wrong way? They it dawned on me: It's right for right-handers.
It always agitated me that it looked so wrong. But now my pointer has a pointing right orientation and the little pointing finger that comes up when you roll over links is a left hand. My laptop is now even more perfect for lefties! I love it.
Now if I could only do something about the mousepad and keyboard...
Self
It always agitated me that it looked so wrong. But now my pointer has a pointing right orientation and the little pointing finger that comes up when you roll over links is a left hand. My laptop is now even more perfect for lefties! I love it.
Now if I could only do something about the mousepad and keyboard...
Self
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Thanksgiving break
I am upset right now. I told Taiyou I would take her to the airport over a month ago and now my parental unit is forcing me out of it. Because it's better for him. What about Taiyou? He told me to tell to take a taxi. To take a taxi to a place 30 minutes away. That is crazy expensive especially when I could take her and get home around the same amount of time. 1hour 30 minutes no matter what I do, so I figured I'd help a friend with 30 of them.
I don't understand why he's this way but then I do. I understand he worries but I don't understand what these severe worries are founded upon. I have to learn to travel. It's not like he didn't provide me with 50 thousand different maps, all current, of the places closest to me to which I could end up going.
This is really frustrating. I hate to do this to Taiyou but I have no choice. I wish I had mentioned it earlier so that if (indeed when) he did this Taiyou would have had mor notice than the day of.
I really hate this. I can't believe I'm backing out on my word. I didn't even want to wait until 4 to leave but because I had already told her I would take I relented and decide to wait for her to get out of class.
I hope she doesn't get mad at me. But then again, it's really not my fault. I made plans to include her, it's just that they got shot down. I hope all goes well for Taiyou. I wish he knew her better. Maybe that would help. Or if she lived somewhere between here and home.
Sigh, alas, I have to do what I do not wish. The damage is done. For the sake of well-being I do not understand.
Self
I don't understand why he's this way but then I do. I understand he worries but I don't understand what these severe worries are founded upon. I have to learn to travel. It's not like he didn't provide me with 50 thousand different maps, all current, of the places closest to me to which I could end up going.
This is really frustrating. I hate to do this to Taiyou but I have no choice. I wish I had mentioned it earlier so that if (indeed when) he did this Taiyou would have had mor notice than the day of.
I really hate this. I can't believe I'm backing out on my word. I didn't even want to wait until 4 to leave but because I had already told her I would take I relented and decide to wait for her to get out of class.
I hope she doesn't get mad at me. But then again, it's really not my fault. I made plans to include her, it's just that they got shot down. I hope all goes well for Taiyou. I wish he knew her better. Maybe that would help. Or if she lived somewhere between here and home.
Sigh, alas, I have to do what I do not wish. The damage is done. For the sake of well-being I do not understand.
Self
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Rat babies
I work it the rat lab here at school. It's my work study location as one of my bosses is the one who does all the rat stuff.
I walked in today, just a few minutes ago and decided to check up on the rats and see if their room was warm enough as it is very cold today. I walked in and didn't see the heater but decided to check out the really cute and now fuzzy rat babies (did you know that they are called kittens, too?) I look in the large cage and see the mum and then I noticed something red. It was half a baby. I continue looking around the cage and I see other babies. One looks like it had it's neck bitten. Another half was lying next to the mum and about 2 or 3 very still ones were just lying there. I couldn't help but stare at first. I'm shaking as I type this. I named one them. I watched them grow, open their eyes, and get fur. I petted them and loved them while I could. I knew they would be used in an experiment later on this school year but I didn't want them to die like this. At least in the experiment they would have died in a less gruesome way than being ripped in half.
Out of all of this I hope that the mum isn't the one who did this. But I really hope that the other babies are safe some place else. It was 15, then 2 died, now it appears that maybe 5 more were killed. Isn't this the reason you take the male out of the cage after they are born? Sigh...I wish this wouldn't happen when you get attached to little ones. I just hope the others are okay, for the experiment and for my heart's sake.
Funny thing is, I never really pegged myself as caring a lot for animals. I guess working with them and wanting to take care of them does that to you.
Why do things have to die? Especially this way. Death can deal with (I'm sure those who know me know that), but murder by evisceration is another thing entirely.
::UPDATE::
Okay, so the babies were all eaten by the mum. Dr. S will have to wait to continue with her experiment. Basically everyone was upset by this. All those who knew the rat babies anyways. Dr. K (the person I work for) was very upset when Dr. M (the other person I work for)called him to ask him if he knew about the babies. Lucky me. First person to see them. At least everyone else had warning.
I think I accidentally worried some people. One of my friends heard about it and asked me if I was okay. Al truth be told, I don't know. I think so but then there are moments when I don't think so. I'm kind of dreading going to work tomorrow but looking forward to it as well. (I would like to know what will be done as far as the experiment and about the mum). And earlier in the evening when I got back from SCSDB, I went in to the science building and saw a white napkin on the stairs and freaked out. I thought it was a dead rat and was horrified at finding another.
At least now I don't have such a vivid picture of the babies. I keep thinking about them and how cute they were and how happy they made me. But I will continue to think of them. I know that people think that isn't the best when you see something that makes you sad but I'll try (and am trying) to think of the happiness they brought me and all the other people that interacted with them.
Self
I walked in today, just a few minutes ago and decided to check up on the rats and see if their room was warm enough as it is very cold today. I walked in and didn't see the heater but decided to check out the really cute and now fuzzy rat babies (did you know that they are called kittens, too?) I look in the large cage and see the mum and then I noticed something red. It was half a baby. I continue looking around the cage and I see other babies. One looks like it had it's neck bitten. Another half was lying next to the mum and about 2 or 3 very still ones were just lying there. I couldn't help but stare at first. I'm shaking as I type this. I named one them. I watched them grow, open their eyes, and get fur. I petted them and loved them while I could. I knew they would be used in an experiment later on this school year but I didn't want them to die like this. At least in the experiment they would have died in a less gruesome way than being ripped in half.
Out of all of this I hope that the mum isn't the one who did this. But I really hope that the other babies are safe some place else. It was 15, then 2 died, now it appears that maybe 5 more were killed. Isn't this the reason you take the male out of the cage after they are born? Sigh...I wish this wouldn't happen when you get attached to little ones. I just hope the others are okay, for the experiment and for my heart's sake.
Funny thing is, I never really pegged myself as caring a lot for animals. I guess working with them and wanting to take care of them does that to you.
Why do things have to die? Especially this way. Death can deal with (I'm sure those who know me know that), but murder by evisceration is another thing entirely.
::UPDATE::
Okay, so the babies were all eaten by the mum. Dr. S will have to wait to continue with her experiment. Basically everyone was upset by this. All those who knew the rat babies anyways. Dr. K (the person I work for) was very upset when Dr. M (the other person I work for)called him to ask him if he knew about the babies. Lucky me. First person to see them. At least everyone else had warning.
I think I accidentally worried some people. One of my friends heard about it and asked me if I was okay. Al truth be told, I don't know. I think so but then there are moments when I don't think so. I'm kind of dreading going to work tomorrow but looking forward to it as well. (I would like to know what will be done as far as the experiment and about the mum). And earlier in the evening when I got back from SCSDB, I went in to the science building and saw a white napkin on the stairs and freaked out. I thought it was a dead rat and was horrified at finding another.
At least now I don't have such a vivid picture of the babies. I keep thinking about them and how cute they were and how happy they made me. But I will continue to think of them. I know that people think that isn't the best when you see something that makes you sad but I'll try (and am trying) to think of the happiness they brought me and all the other people that interacted with them.
Self
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Odd Dream...I think
Okay Moon is very weird in my dream/awaking state. But I'm sure you knew that from previous posts.
Okay, this morning I woke up around 7. I laid for a bit and then rolled over and looked in Taiyou's bed next to me. As I gazed, I noticed that Moon was also in Taiyou's bed. At seeing this I immediately freak out and roll back over. All I could think was "But Taiyou's straight!" and things along the line of "Why didn't I wake up?" I then decided to make sure that Moon was actually in her bed, so I rolled back over and indeed she was. Still freaked out, I turned toward the wall again. Frustrated at the ridiculousness of the situation, I checked the bed again. Moon was missing! Excited I look down (Taiyou and I have loft beds which Moon sleeps under on her futon) and notice she's now in her bed. Now that everything is normal, I get up and go to the bathroom. I come back get into bed and try to go back to sleep. I then roll over and see Moon in bed with me. So, I tell her "get out of my bed."
she replied, "in a minute."
"whatever." and roll back over.
I then waited and looked back to see if she had moved and indeed she was back in her bed.
Amazingly, all of her movements were completely silent. This makes be believe that I was really asleep except for when I went to the bathroom.
Something funny though. Moon said that she remembered saying "in a minute" in one of her dreams.
odd but whatever.
I hope that I just have weird dreams. And not a promiscuous roommate.
self
Okay, this morning I woke up around 7. I laid for a bit and then rolled over and looked in Taiyou's bed next to me. As I gazed, I noticed that Moon was also in Taiyou's bed. At seeing this I immediately freak out and roll back over. All I could think was "But Taiyou's straight!" and things along the line of "Why didn't I wake up?" I then decided to make sure that Moon was actually in her bed, so I rolled back over and indeed she was. Still freaked out, I turned toward the wall again. Frustrated at the ridiculousness of the situation, I checked the bed again. Moon was missing! Excited I look down (Taiyou and I have loft beds which Moon sleeps under on her futon) and notice she's now in her bed. Now that everything is normal, I get up and go to the bathroom. I come back get into bed and try to go back to sleep. I then roll over and see Moon in bed with me. So, I tell her "get out of my bed."
she replied, "in a minute."
"whatever." and roll back over.
I then waited and looked back to see if she had moved and indeed she was back in her bed.
Amazingly, all of her movements were completely silent. This makes be believe that I was really asleep except for when I went to the bathroom.
Something funny though. Moon said that she remembered saying "in a minute" in one of her dreams.
odd but whatever.
I hope that I just have weird dreams. And not a promiscuous roommate.
self
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
Fun Quiz
Your result for The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test...
Modern, Cool Nerd
61 % Nerd, 78% Geek, 48% Dork
For The Record:
A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd and Geek, earning you the title of: Modern, Cool Nerd.
Nerds didn't use to be cool, but in the 90's that all changed. It used to be that, if you were a computer expert, you had to wear plaid or a pocket protector or suspenders or something that announced to the world that you couldn't quite fit in. Not anymore. Now, the intelligent and geeky have eked out for themselves a modicum of respect at the very least, and "geek is chic." The Modern, Cool Nerd is intelligent, knowledgable and always the person to call in a crisis (needing computer advice/an arcane bit of trivia knowledge). They are the one you want as your lifeline in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (or the one up there, winning the million bucks)!
Congratulations!
Also, you might want to check out some of my other tests if you're interested in any of the following:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Professional Wrestling
Love & Sexuality
America/Politics
Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST
A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd and Geek, earning you the title of: Modern, Cool Nerd.
Nerds didn't use to be cool, but in the 90's that all changed. It used to be that, if you were a computer expert, you had to wear plaid or a pocket protector or suspenders or something that announced to the world that you couldn't quite fit in. Not anymore. Now, the intelligent and geeky have eked out for themselves a modicum of respect at the very least, and "geek is chic." The Modern, Cool Nerd is intelligent, knowledgable and always the person to call in a crisis (needing computer advice/an arcane bit of trivia knowledge). They are the one you want as your lifeline in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (or the one up there, winning the million bucks)!
Congratulations!
Also, you might want to check out some of my other tests if you're interested in any of the following:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Professional Wrestling
Love & Sexuality
America/Politics
Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST
Take The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test at HelloQuizzy
Hm, who'd a' thunk it?
Self
Wow,...amazing quiz
For a two question quiz this one really worked out fairly well. It's off slightly on some points but mostly true.
Graces have a need for knowledge and are introverted, curious, analytical, and insightful.
How to Get Along with Me
What I Like About Being a Grace
* standing back and viewing life objectively
* coming to a thorough understanding; perceiving causes and effects
* my sense of integrity: doing what I think is right and not being influenced by social pressure
* not being caught up in material possessions and status
* being calm in a crisis
What's Hard About Being a Grace
Graces as Children Often
Graces as Parents
This makes me wonder about myself and how other percieve me versus how I do. Hmm, maybe I should ask.
Self
Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...
You Are a Grace!
You are a Grace -- "I need to understand the world."
Graces have a need for knowledge and are introverted, curious, analytical, and insightful.
How to Get Along with Me
- * Be independent, not clingy
- * Speak in a straightforward and brief manner
- * I need time alone to process my feelings and thoughts
- * Remember that If I seem aloof, distant, or arrogant, it may be that I am feeling uncomfortable
- * Make me feel welcome, but not too intensely, or I might doubt your sincerity
- * If I become irritated when I have to repeat things, it may be because it was such an effort to get my thoughts out in the first place
- * don't come on like a bulldozer
- * Help me to avoid my pet peeves: big parties, other people's loud music, overdone emotions, and intrusions on my privacy
What I Like About Being a Grace
* standing back and viewing life objectively
* coming to a thorough understanding; perceiving causes and effects
* my sense of integrity: doing what I think is right and not being influenced by social pressure
* not being caught up in material possessions and status
* being calm in a crisis
What's Hard About Being a Grace
- * being slow to put my knowledge and insights out in the world
- * feeling bad when I act defensive or like a know-it-all
- * being pressured to be with people when I don't want to be
- * watching others with better social skills, but less intelligence or technical skill, do better professionally
Graces as Children Often
- * spend a lot of time alone reading, making collections, and so on
- * have a few special friends rather than many
- * are very bright and curious and do well in school
- * have independent minds and often question their parents and teachers
- * watch events from a detached point of view, gathering information
- * assume a poker face in order not to look afraid
- * are sensitive; avoid interpersonal conflict
- * feel intruded upon and controlled and/or ignored and neglected
Graces as Parents
- * are often kind, perceptive, and devoted
- * are sometimes authoritarian and demanding
- * may expect more intellectual achievement than is developmentally appropriate
- * may be intolerant of their children expressing strong emotions
Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz at HelloQuizzy
This makes me wonder about myself and how other percieve me versus how I do. Hmm, maybe I should ask.
Self
Friday, October 17, 2008
Anointing of Dracula
I love the theatre and hate it. It takes so much time to be involved in it but it is very worth it once it's all over. It is now close tech week and the end of my life. We have had rehearsal from every night this week and will do so next week. He's been generous enough to give us Saturday off but tech week officially starts Sunday. Call at 6:30 ending whenever B (the director) wants to let us go. We've even already started using makeup and costumes. I hate getting into and out of the makeup but it is necessary. I really like my role, too. And to make everything great our Dracula is amazing! I can't go into details until after the show starts but he looks great. And the actor is really good as well. I can't wait for the show to start. It will be amazing fun, as long as there aren't any drunk people to bother me. Again*. I apparently have to come up with something witty to say to idiot people who will invariably approach me and attempt to be as stupid as possible.
*Last year at the haunted house, not an actual show but with the theatre club, I was a dead body. For some reason, some of the viewers thought that I should have been moving. So they let the whacking commence. Not to make it sound too bad however, they only whacked my foot. But one can never be too careful with drunk people especially if you don't know if the the people are violent drunks.
Self
*Last year at the haunted house, not an actual show but with the theatre club, I was a dead body. For some reason, some of the viewers thought that I should have been moving. So they let the whacking commence. Not to make it sound too bad however, they only whacked my foot. But one can never be too careful with drunk people especially if you don't know if the the people are violent drunks.
Self
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Why Girls make better Crossplayers
I noticed at AWA that girls crossplaying the same characters as guys cosplaying were typically better. As an example, a girl crossplaying Link from Zelda:
Don't you just love the dedication women make to become men?
Don't you just love the dedication women make to become men?
Monday, September 29, 2008
Good News and Bad News
Who ever coined the sayikng "No news is good news"? I'd like to personally stab him/her/it in the face. And kick him/her/it a bit while they wallow on the ground in pain.
Good news first (it's not enough to really cheer anyone up after the bad): The bailout bill failed to pass the House.
Bad news second:
the DOW fell 777pts
Whacovia was bought out by Citigroup.
However, this second bad point isn't so bad. I still have money and there's no need for me to go rushing to the bank right now. I would say I have faith in the FDIC but you can only trust this messed up government so far. I don't think that in a major bank failure that the government would have enough money (how BIG is our national debt now?) to truly guarantee all the deposits. I have a feeling that It would pick and choose who to give money back to if it came to it. I wonder how much Bill Gates would have?
On a happier note, (I just thought of The Pursuit of Happyness) I think I did well on my ASL test tonight. I really do enjoy ASL even though people confuse me sometimes when they gesticulate as I think they are about to sign something to me. I now think signs instead of words. The wonders of foreign language.
Self
Good news first (it's not enough to really cheer anyone up after the bad): The bailout bill failed to pass the House.
Bad news second:
the DOW fell 777pts
Whacovia was bought out by Citigroup.
However, this second bad point isn't so bad. I still have money and there's no need for me to go rushing to the bank right now. I would say I have faith in the FDIC but you can only trust this messed up government so far. I don't think that in a major bank failure that the government would have enough money (how BIG is our national debt now?) to truly guarantee all the deposits. I have a feeling that It would pick and choose who to give money back to if it came to it. I wonder how much Bill Gates would have?
On a happier note, (I just thought of The Pursuit of Happyness) I think I did well on my ASL test tonight. I really do enjoy ASL even though people confuse me sometimes when they gesticulate as I think they are about to sign something to me. I now think signs instead of words. The wonders of foreign language.
Self
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Internet difficulties
:::UPDATE:::
yes, okay. i understand now. below is just a rant because I really never wanted to leave work. But while i was gone to rehearsal Dude came and set up the router. The reason he wasn't able to come earlier was because someone apparently crashed the Internet. i don't understand that as I was on the Internet while it was apparently crashed. But whatever. He was really cool as he didn't have to stay after to set up my router. I didn't expect him to and he really shouldn't have in my opinion. I'm thankful for it, needless to say he really surprised me. i should tell him I appreciate it. I'll go do that now.
disregard all that is below.
Self
_________________________
i hate it when people don't do things they say they will and proceed to not do them without warning.
Light, Taiyou, and I have been waiting very happily for the router to be set up. It's my router so I diligently took the router to campus tech and had it worked on there. After Dude finished with it, he emailed me and informed me that I needed to set up an appointment to finish the set up. So I email him back and forth in attempts to get a good and close time to set it up. He can't work on my class and work schedule so I decide to take time off from Work-Study and set up the router at his request. Despite the time and day being his request, he did not call me. So after waiting 10 minutes past the time he was to call, I called him. One of the work-study ladies answered saying he wasn't in the office. Wow, what a butthole. How can you pick the time and date and then not show up or say that you won't be able to do it? I hope he has a good excuse for wasting my time and money. It's been 30 minutes and he still hasn't called me. I think I just should go back to work and worry about the router later. I also need to keep in mind that the router will not work without him. Therefore, I cannot say rude/bad things when he does manage to call or when I email him.
Moon is being very odd while talking to her laptop. She keeps saying "you poor thing." I've never thought about talking to Draco (my laptop) in the same way I'd talk with something living. Not to say that I don't talk to Draco. It's usually pleading or fussing at him but talking nonetheless.
Here's to going back to work to get money and forget about idiot Dude who should be helping me with my router.
*Sigh!*
Self
yes, okay. i understand now. below is just a rant because I really never wanted to leave work. But while i was gone to rehearsal Dude came and set up the router. The reason he wasn't able to come earlier was because someone apparently crashed the Internet. i don't understand that as I was on the Internet while it was apparently crashed. But whatever. He was really cool as he didn't have to stay after to set up my router. I didn't expect him to and he really shouldn't have in my opinion. I'm thankful for it, needless to say he really surprised me. i should tell him I appreciate it. I'll go do that now.
disregard all that is below.
Self
_________________________
i hate it when people don't do things they say they will and proceed to not do them without warning.
Light, Taiyou, and I have been waiting very happily for the router to be set up. It's my router so I diligently took the router to campus tech and had it worked on there. After Dude finished with it, he emailed me and informed me that I needed to set up an appointment to finish the set up. So I email him back and forth in attempts to get a good and close time to set it up. He can't work on my class and work schedule so I decide to take time off from Work-Study and set up the router at his request. Despite the time and day being his request, he did not call me. So after waiting 10 minutes past the time he was to call, I called him. One of the work-study ladies answered saying he wasn't in the office. Wow, what a butthole. How can you pick the time and date and then not show up or say that you won't be able to do it? I hope he has a good excuse for wasting my time and money. It's been 30 minutes and he still hasn't called me. I think I just should go back to work and worry about the router later. I also need to keep in mind that the router will not work without him. Therefore, I cannot say rude/bad things when he does manage to call or when I email him.
Moon is being very odd while talking to her laptop. She keeps saying "you poor thing." I've never thought about talking to Draco (my laptop) in the same way I'd talk with something living. Not to say that I don't talk to Draco. It's usually pleading or fussing at him but talking nonetheless.
Here's to going back to work to get money and forget about idiot Dude who should be helping me with my router.
*Sigh!*
Self
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
AWA
I went to AWA (Anime Weekend Atlanta) last weekend and it was amazing! I had fun with people I didn't know and might not see again. I love it when I'm surrounded by nonconventional people. It's so comforting. Especailly so at conventions. You walk around and quickly inhale and pull out your camera because a really awesome real life version of your favorite charater just walked by. You stop them for a picture and others join you sparking a mini photo shoot. You go back and join your group only to stop again when one of your friends sees another awesome cosplayer or is considered one herself. I love that this behavior is normal. Completely and totally normal. God I love me. Being odd or wierd is a good excuse to do whatever you please. No action can be abnormal because you yourself are abnormal. It's really cool and rocks. Sigh, I love me and my wierdness. Although, my offball self has led me into poverty as I spent almost $200 which I don't really have on the weekend. And not only that but I wish to repeat this poverty next year. God I love it. I even got to try on a corset. It was fun and amazingly comfortable once I adjusted to the change in breathing. But I think I would have wanted to punch the man had he made it tighter. It was really cute though! I feel great that I can choose to wear a corset and not have to worry about social convention commanding me to. Gotta love women's lib. And homework which I have neglected. Man this post is very stream-of-consciousness.
luvs!
self
luvs!
self
Thursday, September 18, 2008
SCSDB
I went to the South Caroline School for the Deaf and Blind (SCSDB) yesterday. I went with my ASL class. It was really fun. We played musical chairs with kids all of whom were deaf or hard-of-hearing. Some of them had hearing aid or cochlear implants. I got to meet a really cool 11 year old named Sarah. We didn't talk much because of my very limited vocabulary but it was still cool. At least for me. She even gave me my name sign! I am officially becoming a part of the Deaf community! Yay!
But before I was able to visit with and play with the kids, I had to get to SCSDB. Now that was the difficult part.
Like a good little Self, I got directions online to and from SCSDB. I got there with no problems other than slow traffic making me 5 minutes late. I celebrated when I saw the school and knew that I would be okay now that I found it. Wrong! I had some indication of where I was on the way there as I had been in that part of collegetown previously. Unfortunately, I had never been on campus before.
As you probably have guessed: I got lost. Yes, I got lost on the school campus. You wouldn't think deaf and blind kids need so much space to exist in a boarding school. That campus is huge! I took the first turn I saw that had SCSDB's sign on it. I turned in and began looking for the building where my class was to meet. I searched and didn't find it after driving in a substantial distance. I knew that I shouldn't have needed to go that far in to get to the welcoming center. So I turned around hoping to see a sign I'd missed.
Nope, no sign. I see a guy getting out of a car and decide that I can just ask him for help. I blow the horn. Smart move, yeah, I know. Deaf school so I blow the horn to get a guy's attention. Brilliant.
I decided to see if I could find anyone else. There were no other people out and about. Very frustrating: when you want pedestrians to be around you, they are no where to be found; when you would really like to get where you are going, they step out in front of you and walk slowly. Go figure.
Anywho, after circling around, going places I shouldn't, and calling two classmates I finally saw I girl walking toward me. Salvation! So I wave her over and ask if she knows where to find my building. Of course she responds by signing "deaf." To my joy my brain did not panic but instead, I simply fingerspelled the name of the building I needed. And guess what, she pointed to the building right next to me. The one right next to me! The only building that wasn't labeled was the one I needed! I was really glad to have found her. In all honesty, I was more comfortable asking for directions in real life than talking with Sarah in our immersion experience. I guess I felt I was expected to preform on a certain level in class than outside of it. It makes me feel good to know that I have had a successful experience with a member of the Deaf community. And own my on. It was good even though it was the result of my poor directional skills.
But one thing still bothers me: why is the only building on campus not labeled with it's name is the very one I needed to go to and the one required for all guests to go to? Next time I won't take the back entrance. But at least I know my way around the school.
Self
But before I was able to visit with and play with the kids, I had to get to SCSDB. Now that was the difficult part.
Like a good little Self, I got directions online to and from SCSDB. I got there with no problems other than slow traffic making me 5 minutes late. I celebrated when I saw the school and knew that I would be okay now that I found it. Wrong! I had some indication of where I was on the way there as I had been in that part of collegetown previously. Unfortunately, I had never been on campus before.
As you probably have guessed: I got lost. Yes, I got lost on the school campus. You wouldn't think deaf and blind kids need so much space to exist in a boarding school. That campus is huge! I took the first turn I saw that had SCSDB's sign on it. I turned in and began looking for the building where my class was to meet. I searched and didn't find it after driving in a substantial distance. I knew that I shouldn't have needed to go that far in to get to the welcoming center. So I turned around hoping to see a sign I'd missed.
Nope, no sign. I see a guy getting out of a car and decide that I can just ask him for help. I blow the horn. Smart move, yeah, I know. Deaf school so I blow the horn to get a guy's attention. Brilliant.
I decided to see if I could find anyone else. There were no other people out and about. Very frustrating: when you want pedestrians to be around you, they are no where to be found; when you would really like to get where you are going, they step out in front of you and walk slowly. Go figure.
Anywho, after circling around, going places I shouldn't, and calling two classmates I finally saw I girl walking toward me. Salvation! So I wave her over and ask if she knows where to find my building. Of course she responds by signing "deaf." To my joy my brain did not panic but instead, I simply fingerspelled the name of the building I needed. And guess what, she pointed to the building right next to me. The one right next to me! The only building that wasn't labeled was the one I needed! I was really glad to have found her. In all honesty, I was more comfortable asking for directions in real life than talking with Sarah in our immersion experience. I guess I felt I was expected to preform on a certain level in class than outside of it. It makes me feel good to know that I have had a successful experience with a member of the Deaf community. And own my on. It was good even though it was the result of my poor directional skills.
But one thing still bothers me: why is the only building on campus not labeled with it's name is the very one I needed to go to and the one required for all guests to go to? Next time I won't take the back entrance. But at least I know my way around the school.
Self
Science Humor
I know that I have mentioned before the oddities that amount from being a scinency person. But I have begun to achieve a new level of science geekdom. By the way, this isn't necessarily a bad thing.
In Organic Chem the other day, 5 of us were seated and talking when one girl (K) says that she really likes anothers (J's) mentor. K goes on to explain that as she was leaving paracitology J's mentor called out her name and said "I'm a scloex!" and put her hands up to her face forming two little circles. The table burst out laughing knowing precisely what she was talking about. Do you? Probably not. Most wouldn't. If you want to know, a scolex is the head part of a flatworm that often contains little hooks and suckers for attachment to the worm's host. J's mentor was mimicing the suckers. I must admit it was hilarious.
I can't wait for more dorky and scinecy jokes like this to pop up. I just hope that I don't end up like my old chem prof who tells really cute, corny chemisty jokes. But as I bio major I guess mine would be more of the "I'm a scolex!" type.
Self
In Organic Chem the other day, 5 of us were seated and talking when one girl (K) says that she really likes anothers (J's) mentor. K goes on to explain that as she was leaving paracitology J's mentor called out her name and said "I'm a scloex!" and put her hands up to her face forming two little circles. The table burst out laughing knowing precisely what she was talking about. Do you? Probably not. Most wouldn't. If you want to know, a scolex is the head part of a flatworm that often contains little hooks and suckers for attachment to the worm's host. J's mentor was mimicing the suckers. I must admit it was hilarious.
I can't wait for more dorky and scinecy jokes like this to pop up. I just hope that I don't end up like my old chem prof who tells really cute, corny chemisty jokes. But as I bio major I guess mine would be more of the "I'm a scolex!" type.
Self
Saturday, September 13, 2008
I'm back!
Wow. Lord konws I haven't updated in forever! But I am back. Moon requested it. It's all for you Moon!
Oh, yeah. I now have two roommates: Moon again and Taiyou.
Yes, I'm back at college. I now all but offically live in the science buliding. I go to class there for 3 out of 5 of my classes, I work there, and on Fridays I'm there from early morning until lunch-without leaving. And it's FREEZING all the time! I havve no clue who controls the temperature but they need to turn it up. I'm dreading winter. But at least then I will have a coat on when I walk in the building. I never realized that lab tables could be so cold until I got here.
My mum was very pessimistic about our roommate arrangement. She knew that Moon and I got along well alone but didn't know how Taiyou would affect things. But all is well in collegeville. Except the test looming in the not so far distance of Monday before lunch. Oh well, I have some time left to catch up and make sure i understand how to do things. I really don't want to do terrible on my first Organic test. Or Zoology for that matter. I really should study more often. I hate it though. I'd rather read manga or any other book other than the science ones. Only psych. I like that book. It's interesting. Reading about bond angles and the sturcture of organic compounds isn't so much. I can't wait until we do something interesting.
I love my job. 9 hours in my beloved science building (despite the cold and how frequently I'm there it feels like home and is very comfy - not physically but mentally-when I'm there). I work for two profs in one of my minors. (people always tell me I'm insane for having 2 minors and a major.I reply with "Oh, I'm changing one to a major. So I'll be a double major with a minor." I love me!)
Well, I should go and let Moon have the internet to herself. I terrible not having the router set up. All 3 of us share one ethernet cord. It's sad. <-- I thought that in ASL! That class is really getting to me and changing how I think and act.
Sign good job DB (my ASL prof)
Self
Oh, yeah. I now have two roommates: Moon again and Taiyou.
Yes, I'm back at college. I now all but offically live in the science buliding. I go to class there for 3 out of 5 of my classes, I work there, and on Fridays I'm there from early morning until lunch-without leaving. And it's FREEZING all the time! I havve no clue who controls the temperature but they need to turn it up. I'm dreading winter. But at least then I will have a coat on when I walk in the building. I never realized that lab tables could be so cold until I got here.
My mum was very pessimistic about our roommate arrangement. She knew that Moon and I got along well alone but didn't know how Taiyou would affect things. But all is well in collegeville. Except the test looming in the not so far distance of Monday before lunch. Oh well, I have some time left to catch up and make sure i understand how to do things. I really don't want to do terrible on my first Organic test. Or Zoology for that matter. I really should study more often. I hate it though. I'd rather read manga or any other book other than the science ones. Only psych. I like that book. It's interesting. Reading about bond angles and the sturcture of organic compounds isn't so much. I can't wait until we do something interesting.
I love my job. 9 hours in my beloved science building (despite the cold and how frequently I'm there it feels like home and is very comfy - not physically but mentally-when I'm there). I work for two profs in one of my minors. (people always tell me I'm insane for having 2 minors and a major.I reply with "Oh, I'm changing one to a major. So I'll be a double major with a minor." I love me!)
Well, I should go and let Moon have the internet to herself. I terrible not having the router set up. All 3 of us share one ethernet cord. It's sad. <-- I thought that in ASL! That class is really getting to me and changing how I think and act.
Sign good job DB (my ASL prof)
Self
Sunday, May 11, 2008
A "Hi!" Update
Hi again!
I just went out to my car and, happy joy! (man I'm sounding more and more like Moon), there was nothing attached to the car. No blood, no fur, nothing. I didn't drag anything home. It's still upsetting that I killed something that really didn't do anything wrong but I just have to come to terms with actually killing it needlessly.
It makes me think of a poem by one of the former teachers at my high school wrote. He's passed away now and he never was my teacher but on of the sponsors for the school Reading Club knew and let us read some of his works. On was about him jogging in the morning and seeing a dead frog in the road. He had just had a triple bypass as he jogged past the roadkill frog. He commented in the poem that if they both had been back in time then he would have bbe ndead but not the frog. That poem really makes me think about how we have changed the world and continue to do so as time passes. It makes me wonder if we will permanently damage the world and ruin it for future generations, how many more will be able to survive in the world that we contiuously destroy and make a worse place to live. Hopefully the earth can recover and become even more beautiful than it is now.
Can you tell I'm somewhat of a tree-hugger?
Oh, by the way, FYI, I really do hug trees sometimes if it strikes me to do so. My friends seem to think it's funny and/or cute when I do it. One of them even took a picture of me hugging one when we were walking to church one Sunday.
Self
I just went out to my car and, happy joy! (man I'm sounding more and more like Moon), there was nothing attached to the car. No blood, no fur, nothing. I didn't drag anything home. It's still upsetting that I killed something that really didn't do anything wrong but I just have to come to terms with actually killing it needlessly.
It makes me think of a poem by one of the former teachers at my high school wrote. He's passed away now and he never was my teacher but on of the sponsors for the school Reading Club knew and let us read some of his works. On was about him jogging in the morning and seeing a dead frog in the road. He had just had a triple bypass as he jogged past the roadkill frog. He commented in the poem that if they both had been back in time then he would have bbe ndead but not the frog. That poem really makes me think about how we have changed the world and continue to do so as time passes. It makes me wonder if we will permanently damage the world and ruin it for future generations, how many more will be able to survive in the world that we contiuously destroy and make a worse place to live. Hopefully the earth can recover and become even more beautiful than it is now.
Can you tell I'm somewhat of a tree-hugger?
Oh, by the way, FYI, I really do hug trees sometimes if it strikes me to do so. My friends seem to think it's funny and/or cute when I do it. One of them even took a picture of me hugging one when we were walking to church one Sunday.
Self
Hi!
Hello blogverse!
Long time no see!
Sorry about that, school got in the way. I have been visiting though. I've been reading Mm's blog and Moon's. Even though Moon hasn't been updating much either.
Anywho, I feel pretty bad right now for a number of reasons:
1) I hit some small creature that darted out at me last night when coming home from a party. I have yet to check and make sure there is no blood or animal remnants on the car. It upsets me more than I expected it too. It just makes me feel bad to have killed something that wasn't so much as bothering me. But even if I had seen the thing before I did, I still mostly likely wouldn't have been able to stop and I wasn't about to kill both Moon and myself over an animal, no matter how bad I feel about runing it over.
2)Exams. 'nuff said.
3) It's mother's day and I forgot to even so much as call my mum and talk with her. I remembered her birthday but no this. The thing is I thought so muxh about mother's day over the past weeks because I didn't (and still don't) know what to get her. I know that I'll have it by the time I get home this week for the summer but I was so focused on getting the gift that I completly forgot to even talk to her. She called me. I hate that. And to make matter's worse. My brother forgot too. Sigh...
4) I haven't had God time yet. It's almost dinner and I have completed very little that is vital to my existance. Like studying and reading my Bible. I did eat though. I also washed clothes and dishes. That's great and all but I feel so behind and unproductive. Once I get started I should feel better though.
*Sigh* Life...too short for all I want to fit in it.
Oh! I just remembered a quote that Moon said that I absolutely love! When talking about relatives who lived through the Great Depression and what they taught thier daughter she said, "They pinched the dust the pennies leave behind." I love my roommate! It (the quote) and she make me very happy!
studying to do...
Self
Long time no see!
Sorry about that, school got in the way. I have been visiting though. I've been reading Mm's blog and Moon's. Even though Moon hasn't been updating much either.
Anywho, I feel pretty bad right now for a number of reasons:
1) I hit some small creature that darted out at me last night when coming home from a party. I have yet to check and make sure there is no blood or animal remnants on the car. It upsets me more than I expected it too. It just makes me feel bad to have killed something that wasn't so much as bothering me. But even if I had seen the thing before I did, I still mostly likely wouldn't have been able to stop and I wasn't about to kill both Moon and myself over an animal, no matter how bad I feel about runing it over.
2)Exams. 'nuff said.
3) It's mother's day and I forgot to even so much as call my mum and talk with her. I remembered her birthday but no this. The thing is I thought so muxh about mother's day over the past weeks because I didn't (and still don't) know what to get her. I know that I'll have it by the time I get home this week for the summer but I was so focused on getting the gift that I completly forgot to even talk to her. She called me. I hate that. And to make matter's worse. My brother forgot too. Sigh...
4) I haven't had God time yet. It's almost dinner and I have completed very little that is vital to my existance. Like studying and reading my Bible. I did eat though. I also washed clothes and dishes. That's great and all but I feel so behind and unproductive. Once I get started I should feel better though.
*Sigh* Life...too short for all I want to fit in it.
Oh! I just remembered a quote that Moon said that I absolutely love! When talking about relatives who lived through the Great Depression and what they taught thier daughter she said, "They pinched the dust the pennies leave behind." I love my roommate! It (the quote) and she make me very happy!
studying to do...
Self
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Friday, April 25, 2008
National Day of Silence
Yay!
Some way to make an impact on those surrounding us! I love the GLBTQ community and those involved with it! Some Christians would have conniptions if they heard a professing and practicing Christian say that. As if I can't love gays and be Christian. Pish-posh!
So far today has gone pretty well. I made a few mistakes by making little confirmatory noises and things but otherwise, I've been okay.
One of the not so good things is that I just had a conversation with a friend of mine via texting. He is also Christian but doesn't seem to feel the same way I do about homosexuality. I told him I could talk to him because of DOS but he said the day is pointless and made the comment that no one would know why we are silent if we couldn't talk. As if we are stupid enough to have a day of silence to show people that discrimination against LGBTQ is going on and needs to be stopped without telling people why we are having the day. The conversation stopped after I told him we aren't stupid.
This makes me wonder if I'm all alone in my thoughts concerning how Christians should be. I personally think that there is nothing wrong with gays. Gays are people, it's just another classification. That's all. However, I am aware of what the Bible says so I cannot deny that is says that homosexuality is a sin. Unfortunately, most people stop there. They don't go on the rest of the list (as homosexuality is always placed in a list of other things considered sin by God) and attempt to condemn those people. If everyone is a sinner, then while only hate homosexuals? Shouldn't you hate all sinners if you are going to do that? Yeah, you should. If we were to do that then there would be no religion. What I feel Christians should do is accept everyone. Accept everyone for all of their short comings. God calls us to love not to hate. There should be no such thing as a non-gay-affirming church. No church should not accept someone regardless of what that person has done whether kill a little kid or simply love someone of the same gender.
I've had a conversation before with the same friend I was texting. He questioned me of whether or not I thought that a person could be born GBLTQ. I told him that truly thought that it doesn't matter as all are sinners in the first place but that it was highly possible based solely off of Biblical truths. Everyone knows that sin is in the flesh. And that Satan has power over this world. Also, flesh is of this world. Therefore, Satan has power over flesh which houses our minds from which our sexual orientation comes. If people can be born with a tendency to be angry/have a quick temper then why couldn't they have a genetic predisposition to be gay?
But none of that matters. We are all children of God and loved by God. We as Christians are attempting to love just as God loves and should therefore extend that love to everyone.
I think that I would like to have offspring just to have someone know and understand that people are people are people, regardless of sexual orientation or any thing else that makes us all so wonderfully different as determined by God the Father.
I think I can come off of my soap box now. I could talk about LGBTQ issues all day! I wish I could run into one of those sign toting protesters who don't know just how much God really loves everyone.
Self
Some way to make an impact on those surrounding us! I love the GLBTQ community and those involved with it! Some Christians would have conniptions if they heard a professing and practicing Christian say that. As if I can't love gays and be Christian. Pish-posh!
So far today has gone pretty well. I made a few mistakes by making little confirmatory noises and things but otherwise, I've been okay.
One of the not so good things is that I just had a conversation with a friend of mine via texting. He is also Christian but doesn't seem to feel the same way I do about homosexuality. I told him I could talk to him because of DOS but he said the day is pointless and made the comment that no one would know why we are silent if we couldn't talk. As if we are stupid enough to have a day of silence to show people that discrimination against LGBTQ is going on and needs to be stopped without telling people why we are having the day. The conversation stopped after I told him we aren't stupid.
This makes me wonder if I'm all alone in my thoughts concerning how Christians should be. I personally think that there is nothing wrong with gays. Gays are people, it's just another classification. That's all. However, I am aware of what the Bible says so I cannot deny that is says that homosexuality is a sin. Unfortunately, most people stop there. They don't go on the rest of the list (as homosexuality is always placed in a list of other things considered sin by God) and attempt to condemn those people. If everyone is a sinner, then while only hate homosexuals? Shouldn't you hate all sinners if you are going to do that? Yeah, you should. If we were to do that then there would be no religion. What I feel Christians should do is accept everyone. Accept everyone for all of their short comings. God calls us to love not to hate. There should be no such thing as a non-gay-affirming church. No church should not accept someone regardless of what that person has done whether kill a little kid or simply love someone of the same gender.
I've had a conversation before with the same friend I was texting. He questioned me of whether or not I thought that a person could be born GBLTQ. I told him that truly thought that it doesn't matter as all are sinners in the first place but that it was highly possible based solely off of Biblical truths. Everyone knows that sin is in the flesh. And that Satan has power over this world. Also, flesh is of this world. Therefore, Satan has power over flesh which houses our minds from which our sexual orientation comes. If people can be born with a tendency to be angry/have a quick temper then why couldn't they have a genetic predisposition to be gay?
But none of that matters. We are all children of God and loved by God. We as Christians are attempting to love just as God loves and should therefore extend that love to everyone.
I think that I would like to have offspring just to have someone know and understand that people are people are people, regardless of sexual orientation or any thing else that makes us all so wonderfully different as determined by God the Father.
I think I can come off of my soap box now. I could talk about LGBTQ issues all day! I wish I could run into one of those sign toting protesters who don't know just how much God really loves everyone.
Self
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Dangerous Liaisons
The theatre has taken control over my life.
I don't know if this is a good or bad thing. I now know a lot more about all that goes into producing a performance. And boy is it a lot of work from a lot of people. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if the cast were smaller (10+ people).
I'm running lights. My job should be really easy, pushing a button. But since the prof who was supposed to be setting up the cues really can't due to being one in several million to get a flesh eating virus I have to do lots of wierd things with the light board. But I'm learning and it's not that bad. It could be a lot worse.
Thank God it isn't.
Self
(I'm really aggitated with my laptop as it erased that last paragraph then blogspot autosave the erasing. I HATE having to re-write things.)
I don't know if this is a good or bad thing. I now know a lot more about all that goes into producing a performance. And boy is it a lot of work from a lot of people. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if the cast were smaller (10+ people).
I'm running lights. My job should be really easy, pushing a button. But since the prof who was supposed to be setting up the cues really can't due to being one in several million to get a flesh eating virus I have to do lots of wierd things with the light board. But I'm learning and it's not that bad. It could be a lot worse.
Thank God it isn't.
Self
(I'm really aggitated with my laptop as it erased that last paragraph then blogspot autosave the erasing. I HATE having to re-write things.)
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Relay for Life
Relay for Life was today. I got to have really good baked goods from my team's bake sale and cry a little. I normally do well with death and talking about it but for some reason (I blame personal involvement) the death of my great-uncle to lung cancer hurt me more than any other. And believe me people in my family like to die. We get at least 4 or so a year. Sometimes less but even if you do go to the funeral you hear about so-and-so's cousin or that-person's brother dying. Half the time I don't know the person and even if I do it's become so passe. Odd, I just said that it's passe to die. But it's true everyone does it. With the exception of a few Biblical figures. Anywho, About my uncle. I helped take care of him even before he was diagnosed. After he was diagnosed people came out of the woodwork and decided to occasionally (maybe more often than that word connotes) help my immediate family take care of him. For my dad this was the second victim of lung cancer he had to help. Well not had but you understand. Last time it was his grandpa, my great-uncle's father. You'd think if your dad died of lung cancer from smoking you'd stop. Oh well. It was too late once we found out. It was odd, he really didn't have many symptoms from what I could tell. A cough then a few x-rays later and oh, you have a large cell carcinoma in you lungs (I forget which type precisely otherwise my sciency brain would have compelled me to put here for you. It's too late to find out now, my mom threw away the paper a little while ago.) It took a while for him to really begin to show the pain. Once he couldn't hide it any more he seemed so defeated. It's really hard watching someone you care about lose all of their dignity and self-respect because they feel they are a burden and shouldn't be receiving so much help. It made it difficult to do things for him some times. He refused wheelchairs despite needing one since he had a stroke several years ago. He refused to move into a handicapped apartment because and I quote "I'm not handicapped." Stated around the time when he attempts to enter his apartment and can barely get his foot over the threshold. It amazed me sometimes that he made it over the curb of the sidewalk. I remember once closer to the end when the cancer began to metastasize, he asked me as I walked behind him if I was going to catch him if he began to fall. It surprised me that he admitted it but it showed how far along he'd come from denial of the cancer to acceptance of the fact that he was deteriorating. It forced me to accept it to. I don't think it will be easy to forget that moment of realization that there was definitely no way he would win the fight. He was already weak when diagnosed and then when it was he was it stage three without surgery as a option. I really miss my uncle. It saddens me that I'll never hear his laugh again or see him wring his hands while listening to people talk. I never get to fix his plate for him adding butt loads of pepper to everything on it. I never rearrange anything in his bedroom for him or fix his sheets and pillowcases. I'll never drive him to the store and marvel at his very country way of explaining what he wanted. And the list goes on. Granted I didn't always want to help but I did. Even still it's sad to realize this but kind of a relief all the same. It was tough seeing him go through all of it. The pain he tried to hide from everyone but the nurse/maid that visited his apartment. The sickness his cocktail of meds caused. And perhaps the most sealing thing of all for me, even more so than his comment to me was the DNR order taped to the wall above his bed. Being a cancer patient caregiver is difficult. At the relay, I could have joined the group of caregivers but I didn't. At the time I thought I wouldn't be able to handle it being so close to when he died. I even appreciated it when we did the luminary ceremony when my eyes were very misty. But now I wish I'd gone for him. I feel the luminary wasn't enough. I feel I should have honored him while the wounds were fresh. While he's still fresh and fully loved and not forgotten in my heart.
If I go again next year I don't know if I'll join. Nothing can make up for this year. But next time, next Relay, I'll do what's in my heart. I hope I can honor all of those before me and all the other caretakers whose hearts ache just as mine has and still does. I hope to glorify and honor God, thanking Him for the support and love of those behind the Relay. I hope to honor and do justice to the will of my heart and soul, giving them what they need to finally lay my uncle Ned to rest. And hopefully ease this pain. But never forget it.
Sorry this is so very long. But I needed a place to vent all of this thought about my loved one.
Self
If I go again next year I don't know if I'll join. Nothing can make up for this year. But next time, next Relay, I'll do what's in my heart. I hope I can honor all of those before me and all the other caretakers whose hearts ache just as mine has and still does. I hope to glorify and honor God, thanking Him for the support and love of those behind the Relay. I hope to honor and do justice to the will of my heart and soul, giving them what they need to finally lay my uncle Ned to rest. And hopefully ease this pain. But never forget it.
Sorry this is so very long. But I needed a place to vent all of this thought about my loved one.
Self
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Miyazaki
Man...I just watched the most depressing movie I've seen in a while. It was a Miyazaki movie just like Spirited Away but geez, it was awful because it was good. It was Grave of the Fireflies. I didn't think it would be that sad or maybe that it even would be happy. But no it was a war film. About a boy and his little sister struggling to survive after their mother is killed in an air raid by US planes. It's terrible. And then it gets worse when the boy finds out that his father died in the war and he was left alone to tkae care of his sister. I guess I should have known that I shouldn't expect anything very happy when it started with the boy's death making the entire movie one big flashback. Although, I was thinking that it couldn't be that bad considering it is a Miyazaki film and all of his films have wierd things happening and things being okay in the end even if they aren't perfect. Boy was I really wrong. Ah, well. I need to do something to lift my spirits. Too bad what really faces me is exercise and homework. Oh joy.
Self
Self
Sunday, April 6, 2008
The Technical First Meme
Four Jobs I have had in my life (for which I was paid):
Telemarketer
Tutor
that's all that I was actually paid for
Four Movies I would watch/have watched over and over:
Pumpkinhead
Harry Potter (all that have been made)
Disney's Lion King
Rent
Four Places that I have lived:
G-wood, SC (two different locations here if that counts)
SP, SC
nowhere else
Four TV Shows that I watch:
Bleach
CSI: (Nevada) Miami
Law & Order: SVU
Naruto
Four Places I have visited:
Jacksonville, FL
Anderson. SC
Hartwell, GA (and by default Elberton) I love small towns
Charlotte, NC
Four People who email me regularly:
the college
Facebook
NY Times
Elisa
Four Favorite Foods:
Tuna (in sushi and out of cans, think I'd love it if I had it whole!)
100% Apple Juice
any carb (I'm a carb addict)
shrimp
Four Places I would like to be right now:
my house underneath our old chopped down cedar tree in our hammock
a hot clean nondorm shower
with my sober grandpa
some comfy place flirting with a hot Christian single guy
Four Things I am looking forward to this year:
summer break
gardening this summer (esp. strawberries)
getting a job which doesn't involve getting hung up on by angry people
the end of April
Four People who should post Four Things:
as I don't know many ppl in blog verse no one or rather any who would wish to post
Self
Telemarketer
Tutor
that's all that I was actually paid for
Four Movies I would watch/have watched over and over:
Pumpkinhead
Harry Potter (all that have been made)
Disney's Lion King
Rent
Four Places that I have lived:
G-wood, SC (two different locations here if that counts)
SP, SC
nowhere else
Four TV Shows that I watch:
Bleach
CSI: (Nevada) Miami
Law & Order: SVU
Naruto
Four Places I have visited:
Jacksonville, FL
Anderson. SC
Hartwell, GA (and by default Elberton) I love small towns
Charlotte, NC
Four People who email me regularly:
the college
NY Times
Elisa
Four Favorite Foods:
Tuna (in sushi and out of cans, think I'd love it if I had it whole!)
100% Apple Juice
any carb (I'm a carb addict)
shrimp
Four Places I would like to be right now:
my house underneath our old chopped down cedar tree in our hammock
a hot clean nondorm shower
with my sober grandpa
some comfy place flirting with a hot Christian single guy
Four Things I am looking forward to this year:
summer break
gardening this summer (esp. strawberries)
getting a job which doesn't involve getting hung up on by angry people
the end of April
Four People who should post Four Things:
as I don't know many ppl in blog verse no one or rather any who would wish to post
Self
My First Meme
Okay, Mm has tagged me for this and here are the rules:
1. Pick up the nearest book (at least 123 pages).
2. Turn to page 123.
3. Find the 5th sentence
4. Post the 5th sentence on your blog.
5. Tag 5 people.
So I pick you Speaker for the Dead! By Orson Scott Card. Now...to dig out the book...(I hate coming back from breaks. I'm lazy about unpacking...)
p. 123's 5th sentence:
"The mention of their mother silenced them."
Now 5 people...do I know 5 ppl in blog verse?
Moon, S, and I guess whoever wants to do it.
Self
1. Pick up the nearest book (at least 123 pages).
2. Turn to page 123.
3. Find the 5th sentence
4. Post the 5th sentence on your blog.
5. Tag 5 people.
So I pick you Speaker for the Dead! By Orson Scott Card. Now...to dig out the book...(I hate coming back from breaks. I'm lazy about unpacking...)
p. 123's 5th sentence:
"The mention of their mother silenced them."
Now 5 people...do I know 5 ppl in blog verse?
Moon, S, and I guess whoever wants to do it.
Self
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Science Woes
For all my happiness about my beloved sciences, as time goes by I realize that I am increasingly more dorky. This really isn't bad and on some level I am quite pleased but on another it makes me feel somewhat like an outcast when I think in terms of what most people would know or be able to do or say. For instance, in the lab mentioned in the previous post there was a solution I needed while messing with the wrong group number. It was 6M NH4C2H3O2. I look at this, point to a bottle, and ask the young lady next to me who shares chemicals with me: "Is that the 6 molar ammonium acetate?" This occurred with little thought. She understood me and replied that it was. Very effective communication amongst Bio majors. But still, it sort of disconcerting to realize you will be one of those few people who can actually read and understand processed food labels.
Self
Self
Chemistry Lab...
*Warning: Science Content* <-- I've always wanted to copy Mythbusters that way!
You know being a biology major has it's good points...and it's rather unpleasant points. (Unfortunately, my diction it a bit to close to Moon's frequent use of her overly large vocabulary). Typically it's great to know all these little things about chemical processes within biological actions. It makes it interesting to watch certain movies, slashers mostly. Sweeney Todd...
Back to what I was talking about. Some of the more unpleasant parts comes with inaccuracies presented as thorough fact. But one really annoying thing is chem lab. 4 chem classes are required here at University for BS bio majors. Today in lab, we had to do quantitative analysis of a solid. Basically we have determine what cations (positive ions) and anions (negative ions) are in a solid. For the cations, there are 3 different groups. If you get Group I there's no need to go on to test for Group II or Group III. I tested out of Group I. So I moved on to Group II. I managed to get a positive so I continue following about 22 steps including heating things for 4-5 minutes and centrifuging at least 10 times, until the end where the options were: a white solid or blue liquid. I had pale yellow liquid. My brain goes: Problem. So I go over to prof and he tells me that he wouldn't start over but he (the DOCTOR OF CHEMISTRY) doesn't really know what I should do. After relaying this wonderful information, he promptly turns to another student who needs help. He later informs me that having a false positive for my cation is completely normal considering that the concentrations of the solids was high. I think to myself: Wow, really could have used that info about 20 minutes ago.
All in all, after finding out that I didn't make so big a blunder, I did feel better but I have to finish the lab this week or after we get back from spring break. Apparently, 3hrs isn't enough time to freak out over bad results and finish a completely different portion of experiment. Who'd of guess it?
Done ranting now.
Self
You know being a biology major has it's good points...and it's rather unpleasant points. (Unfortunately, my diction it a bit to close to Moon's frequent use of her overly large vocabulary). Typically it's great to know all these little things about chemical processes within biological actions. It makes it interesting to watch certain movies, slashers mostly. Sweeney Todd...
Back to what I was talking about. Some of the more unpleasant parts comes with inaccuracies presented as thorough fact. But one really annoying thing is chem lab. 4 chem classes are required here at University for BS bio majors. Today in lab, we had to do quantitative analysis of a solid. Basically we have determine what cations (positive ions) and anions (negative ions) are in a solid. For the cations, there are 3 different groups. If you get Group I there's no need to go on to test for Group II or Group III. I tested out of Group I. So I moved on to Group II. I managed to get a positive so I continue following about 22 steps including heating things for 4-5 minutes and centrifuging at least 10 times, until the end where the options were: a white solid or blue liquid. I had pale yellow liquid. My brain goes: Problem. So I go over to prof and he tells me that he wouldn't start over but he (the DOCTOR OF CHEMISTRY) doesn't really know what I should do. After relaying this wonderful information, he promptly turns to another student who needs help. He later informs me that having a false positive for my cation is completely normal considering that the concentrations of the solids was high. I think to myself: Wow, really could have used that info about 20 minutes ago.
All in all, after finding out that I didn't make so big a blunder, I did feel better but I have to finish the lab this week or after we get back from spring break. Apparently, 3hrs isn't enough time to freak out over bad results and finish a completely different portion of experiment. Who'd of guess it?
Done ranting now.
Self
Sunday, March 23, 2008
My Moon
I realized after posting last night that I should really explain the reason that my dearly loved roommate is named Moon.
You could say it started when she discovered fan fiction, specifically Harry Potter fan fiction, which was in high school. At the time, of course, I was not living with her so I could not witness her obsessive habits for myself. I was only given the highly undetailed accounts of how late she stayed up on a certain night staring earnestly at a negative tinged screen to lessen the pain to her eyes. This I thought was assuredly uncommon. Boy was I wrong.
Upon picking a college, I managed to come to the same decision as her and ended up agreeing to be roommates. The first couple of days here at our very wonderful male-less college, we had no internat in the dorms as our wonderful campus technologies people were swampped with requests to connect laptops to the college network. Let's just say that my dearest Moon spent an amount of time in places that contained computers with internet access. I paid no attention, writing it off as a way to rid herself of bordom. Again I must say I was wrong. Very wrong.
Eventually, Moon did get the internet on her laptop (named lappy by the way) and she began to sit in front of it spending more time in the room instead of other buildings. I saw nothing wrong. Until we got started into the semester and I realized that she would read fan fics for hours then do homework into the late hours of the night and subsequently follow this in th mornings of complaints of little and/or poor sleep. Gee, I wonder why?
Anywho, since she would read at all times of day, night, and apocolyptic happenings, I noticed that upon entering the darkened room (we typically don't turn the light on unless necessary)after a shower her sleep ready birthday suit pajama clad self in all its glorious pastiness reflected the light of her fan fic ridden laptop quite well. My very dorky/nerdy/geeky brain automatically equated this reflection with the moon. Therefore, from that point on I began to call her Moon.
She really doesn't seem insulted by the name and general admits to being addicted to fan fiction. I guess this is good as I'd probably still say it when I get agitated. She does say I have a tendency to be violent when angry...hehe, sigh. oh well. It takes me a while to get angry and I haven't killed anyone yet.
Self
You could say it started when she discovered fan fiction, specifically Harry Potter fan fiction, which was in high school. At the time, of course, I was not living with her so I could not witness her obsessive habits for myself. I was only given the highly undetailed accounts of how late she stayed up on a certain night staring earnestly at a negative tinged screen to lessen the pain to her eyes. This I thought was assuredly uncommon. Boy was I wrong.
Upon picking a college, I managed to come to the same decision as her and ended up agreeing to be roommates. The first couple of days here at our very wonderful male-less college, we had no internat in the dorms as our wonderful campus technologies people were swampped with requests to connect laptops to the college network. Let's just say that my dearest Moon spent an amount of time in places that contained computers with internet access. I paid no attention, writing it off as a way to rid herself of bordom. Again I must say I was wrong. Very wrong.
Eventually, Moon did get the internet on her laptop (named lappy by the way) and she began to sit in front of it spending more time in the room instead of other buildings. I saw nothing wrong. Until we got started into the semester and I realized that she would read fan fics for hours then do homework into the late hours of the night and subsequently follow this in th mornings of complaints of little and/or poor sleep. Gee, I wonder why?
Anywho, since she would read at all times of day, night, and apocolyptic happenings, I noticed that upon entering the darkened room (we typically don't turn the light on unless necessary)after a shower her sleep ready birthday suit pajama clad self in all its glorious pastiness reflected the light of her fan fic ridden laptop quite well. My very dorky/nerdy/geeky brain automatically equated this reflection with the moon. Therefore, from that point on I began to call her Moon.
She really doesn't seem insulted by the name and general admits to being addicted to fan fiction. I guess this is good as I'd probably still say it when I get agitated. She does say I have a tendency to be violent when angry...hehe, sigh. oh well. It takes me a while to get angry and I haven't killed anyone yet.
Self
Saturday, March 22, 2008
How do I start...
You know, bloggers make this look easy...How on earth do you know what to write about? I think I may be putting to much thought into this much like I do with other things.
I guess I should start with a recourse of today's events but my day really wasn't all that interesting. When is it? Oh well.
Oh! Idea! My roomie's (Moon) mum has a blog and on one of her recent posts she discussed how she saw her beauty recently. It made me feel so happy and grateful for her. She really is a wonderful and great person. I wish I had sought to tell her this sooner and more often. But anyway, i myself have been dealing with some self-esteem issues and it uplifted me to here someone talk about themselves in such a positive light. I really needed that. It has given me the strength that I have been praying for. *ah-hem* excuse me: the strength for which I have been praying. (Moon and her incessant grammar corrections has begun to take affect on me). Moon's mum really is a blessing. I really should talk with someone about all of my little problems, but I'm too shy and lazy to do so. Oh well, I'll be fine in Christ no matter what happens! Yay! Monkeys! Hehe! ^_^
Self
(who feels much better about herself and has the courage and strength to tackle my problems! Woo!)
I guess I should start with a recourse of today's events but my day really wasn't all that interesting. When is it? Oh well.
Oh! Idea! My roomie's (Moon) mum has a blog and on one of her recent posts she discussed how she saw her beauty recently. It made me feel so happy and grateful for her. She really is a wonderful and great person. I wish I had sought to tell her this sooner and more often. But anyway, i myself have been dealing with some self-esteem issues and it uplifted me to here someone talk about themselves in such a positive light. I really needed that. It has given me the strength that I have been praying for. *ah-hem* excuse me: the strength for which I have been praying. (Moon and her incessant grammar corrections has begun to take affect on me). Moon's mum really is a blessing. I really should talk with someone about all of my little problems, but I'm too shy and lazy to do so. Oh well, I'll be fine in Christ no matter what happens! Yay! Monkeys! Hehe! ^_^
Self
(who feels much better about herself and has the courage and strength to tackle my problems! Woo!)
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