I am upset right now. I told Taiyou I would take her to the airport over a month ago and now my parental unit is forcing me out of it. Because it's better for him. What about Taiyou? He told me to tell to take a taxi. To take a taxi to a place 30 minutes away. That is crazy expensive especially when I could take her and get home around the same amount of time. 1hour 30 minutes no matter what I do, so I figured I'd help a friend with 30 of them.
I don't understand why he's this way but then I do. I understand he worries but I don't understand what these severe worries are founded upon. I have to learn to travel. It's not like he didn't provide me with 50 thousand different maps, all current, of the places closest to me to which I could end up going.
This is really frustrating. I hate to do this to Taiyou but I have no choice. I wish I had mentioned it earlier so that if (indeed when) he did this Taiyou would have had mor notice than the day of.
I really hate this. I can't believe I'm backing out on my word. I didn't even want to wait until 4 to leave but because I had already told her I would take I relented and decide to wait for her to get out of class.
I hope she doesn't get mad at me. But then again, it's really not my fault. I made plans to include her, it's just that they got shot down. I hope all goes well for Taiyou. I wish he knew her better. Maybe that would help. Or if she lived somewhere between here and home.
Sigh, alas, I have to do what I do not wish. The damage is done. For the sake of well-being I do not understand.
Self
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Rat babies
I work it the rat lab here at school. It's my work study location as one of my bosses is the one who does all the rat stuff.
I walked in today, just a few minutes ago and decided to check up on the rats and see if their room was warm enough as it is very cold today. I walked in and didn't see the heater but decided to check out the really cute and now fuzzy rat babies (did you know that they are called kittens, too?) I look in the large cage and see the mum and then I noticed something red. It was half a baby. I continue looking around the cage and I see other babies. One looks like it had it's neck bitten. Another half was lying next to the mum and about 2 or 3 very still ones were just lying there. I couldn't help but stare at first. I'm shaking as I type this. I named one them. I watched them grow, open their eyes, and get fur. I petted them and loved them while I could. I knew they would be used in an experiment later on this school year but I didn't want them to die like this. At least in the experiment they would have died in a less gruesome way than being ripped in half.
Out of all of this I hope that the mum isn't the one who did this. But I really hope that the other babies are safe some place else. It was 15, then 2 died, now it appears that maybe 5 more were killed. Isn't this the reason you take the male out of the cage after they are born? Sigh...I wish this wouldn't happen when you get attached to little ones. I just hope the others are okay, for the experiment and for my heart's sake.
Funny thing is, I never really pegged myself as caring a lot for animals. I guess working with them and wanting to take care of them does that to you.
Why do things have to die? Especially this way. Death can deal with (I'm sure those who know me know that), but murder by evisceration is another thing entirely.
::UPDATE::
Okay, so the babies were all eaten by the mum. Dr. S will have to wait to continue with her experiment. Basically everyone was upset by this. All those who knew the rat babies anyways. Dr. K (the person I work for) was very upset when Dr. M (the other person I work for)called him to ask him if he knew about the babies. Lucky me. First person to see them. At least everyone else had warning.
I think I accidentally worried some people. One of my friends heard about it and asked me if I was okay. Al truth be told, I don't know. I think so but then there are moments when I don't think so. I'm kind of dreading going to work tomorrow but looking forward to it as well. (I would like to know what will be done as far as the experiment and about the mum). And earlier in the evening when I got back from SCSDB, I went in to the science building and saw a white napkin on the stairs and freaked out. I thought it was a dead rat and was horrified at finding another.
At least now I don't have such a vivid picture of the babies. I keep thinking about them and how cute they were and how happy they made me. But I will continue to think of them. I know that people think that isn't the best when you see something that makes you sad but I'll try (and am trying) to think of the happiness they brought me and all the other people that interacted with them.
Self
I walked in today, just a few minutes ago and decided to check up on the rats and see if their room was warm enough as it is very cold today. I walked in and didn't see the heater but decided to check out the really cute and now fuzzy rat babies (did you know that they are called kittens, too?) I look in the large cage and see the mum and then I noticed something red. It was half a baby. I continue looking around the cage and I see other babies. One looks like it had it's neck bitten. Another half was lying next to the mum and about 2 or 3 very still ones were just lying there. I couldn't help but stare at first. I'm shaking as I type this. I named one them. I watched them grow, open their eyes, and get fur. I petted them and loved them while I could. I knew they would be used in an experiment later on this school year but I didn't want them to die like this. At least in the experiment they would have died in a less gruesome way than being ripped in half.
Out of all of this I hope that the mum isn't the one who did this. But I really hope that the other babies are safe some place else. It was 15, then 2 died, now it appears that maybe 5 more were killed. Isn't this the reason you take the male out of the cage after they are born? Sigh...I wish this wouldn't happen when you get attached to little ones. I just hope the others are okay, for the experiment and for my heart's sake.
Funny thing is, I never really pegged myself as caring a lot for animals. I guess working with them and wanting to take care of them does that to you.
Why do things have to die? Especially this way. Death can deal with (I'm sure those who know me know that), but murder by evisceration is another thing entirely.
::UPDATE::
Okay, so the babies were all eaten by the mum. Dr. S will have to wait to continue with her experiment. Basically everyone was upset by this. All those who knew the rat babies anyways. Dr. K (the person I work for) was very upset when Dr. M (the other person I work for)called him to ask him if he knew about the babies. Lucky me. First person to see them. At least everyone else had warning.
I think I accidentally worried some people. One of my friends heard about it and asked me if I was okay. Al truth be told, I don't know. I think so but then there are moments when I don't think so. I'm kind of dreading going to work tomorrow but looking forward to it as well. (I would like to know what will be done as far as the experiment and about the mum). And earlier in the evening when I got back from SCSDB, I went in to the science building and saw a white napkin on the stairs and freaked out. I thought it was a dead rat and was horrified at finding another.
At least now I don't have such a vivid picture of the babies. I keep thinking about them and how cute they were and how happy they made me. But I will continue to think of them. I know that people think that isn't the best when you see something that makes you sad but I'll try (and am trying) to think of the happiness they brought me and all the other people that interacted with them.
Self
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Odd Dream...I think
Okay Moon is very weird in my dream/awaking state. But I'm sure you knew that from previous posts.
Okay, this morning I woke up around 7. I laid for a bit and then rolled over and looked in Taiyou's bed next to me. As I gazed, I noticed that Moon was also in Taiyou's bed. At seeing this I immediately freak out and roll back over. All I could think was "But Taiyou's straight!" and things along the line of "Why didn't I wake up?" I then decided to make sure that Moon was actually in her bed, so I rolled back over and indeed she was. Still freaked out, I turned toward the wall again. Frustrated at the ridiculousness of the situation, I checked the bed again. Moon was missing! Excited I look down (Taiyou and I have loft beds which Moon sleeps under on her futon) and notice she's now in her bed. Now that everything is normal, I get up and go to the bathroom. I come back get into bed and try to go back to sleep. I then roll over and see Moon in bed with me. So, I tell her "get out of my bed."
she replied, "in a minute."
"whatever." and roll back over.
I then waited and looked back to see if she had moved and indeed she was back in her bed.
Amazingly, all of her movements were completely silent. This makes be believe that I was really asleep except for when I went to the bathroom.
Something funny though. Moon said that she remembered saying "in a minute" in one of her dreams.
odd but whatever.
I hope that I just have weird dreams. And not a promiscuous roommate.
self
Okay, this morning I woke up around 7. I laid for a bit and then rolled over and looked in Taiyou's bed next to me. As I gazed, I noticed that Moon was also in Taiyou's bed. At seeing this I immediately freak out and roll back over. All I could think was "But Taiyou's straight!" and things along the line of "Why didn't I wake up?" I then decided to make sure that Moon was actually in her bed, so I rolled back over and indeed she was. Still freaked out, I turned toward the wall again. Frustrated at the ridiculousness of the situation, I checked the bed again. Moon was missing! Excited I look down (Taiyou and I have loft beds which Moon sleeps under on her futon) and notice she's now in her bed. Now that everything is normal, I get up and go to the bathroom. I come back get into bed and try to go back to sleep. I then roll over and see Moon in bed with me. So, I tell her "get out of my bed."
she replied, "in a minute."
"whatever." and roll back over.
I then waited and looked back to see if she had moved and indeed she was back in her bed.
Amazingly, all of her movements were completely silent. This makes be believe that I was really asleep except for when I went to the bathroom.
Something funny though. Moon said that she remembered saying "in a minute" in one of her dreams.
odd but whatever.
I hope that I just have weird dreams. And not a promiscuous roommate.
self
Sunday, November 2, 2008
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